All Joking Aside

by gm

Dina Del Bucchia


Put it away. This is not the right time for a good time. We are having a serious discussion about traditional values, about saving ourselves from enjoying life. If you put it aside it’s easier. Really. It’s like we’re real people. I will not make fun of the size of any part of your body. All of it needs to go away. If we leave some behind it will spark, it could sparkle. It could take up space and then we’d have to get another California Closet organizer to keep track of everything. Slip it into a drawer, a lock box, an old ice cream tub. Once it’s aside we can get to the real meat. Tear into topics with our teeth, the meat of life dripping in sugary ketchup, a dollop of mayo. Joking is the side dish and it’s optional. At some restaurants you have to pay extra for it.  When your laughter gets shushed at a casual bistro you’ll know you’ve been asking for someone to confiscate your joking, keep it in an office drawer like you’re in trouble with the Vice Principal. That’s the level of seriousness. You will need to win it back, but you won’t. It will be claimed missing. You’ve lost. After it’s aside you’re trapped, you’re held accountable for being fun at one time. All joking aside is on a bumper sticker from the 90s and now everyone respects it like it’s in the New York Times. In all seriousness, I crept up on you because it’s funny to scare people.