Your Father the Game Show Announcer

by gm

Billeh Nickerson

 

Each morning he introduces breakfast
in a big booming voice:

YOU GET CEREAL! And AN EGG!
AND A FREE RIDE TO SCHOOL!

And your mother is an announcer as well.
They met at announcer school.

So, she’s all: DON’T FORGET YOUR FABULOUS LUNCH!

And sometimes they synchronize:

A ROOM! WITH A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD!
AND THREE SQUARE MEALS!

And late at night
while they think you’re asleep
they make announcer love:

IT’S A BRAND NEW POSITION!
AND NOW IT’S TIME
TO COME ON DOWN!

And by that point,
you’ve plugged your ears
and hidden your head
beneath the pillows.

You dream of a normal life,
free of exuberant announcements,
free of the pressure to follow
IN YOUR PARENTS’ FOOTSTEPS!